Longings

If there has ever been a time of great longing in my life it's now. There has been a great desire in my in this time to become a part of something lagret then my self. Even if this means leaving behind all that is comfortable and what the world say you can not live with out. Even if it is something that kills ture life. A life that is a gift that is thrown away. This is something that I am not willing to do.

Good Friday

Today, as I wind down of a hard night of work. Yes, you read that correctly. I work nights and the morning time I have to wind down. I can't help but think of what happened over two thosand years ago for all of us. On that cross. What a time of great pain and sorrow. How greatful I am for this great gift given to all of us. That has been given to all of us. Yet, so many don't take it. I need to get back to a place where I have community aound me. It's a matter of finding what that community will be.
I have been slowly reading though the CIS lesson one on the Apostles' Creed. There has been so many things I've read that has been helpful. I am finding that the Cathlic Church a place that has more to give then any other. Leaving the non-denimational church is something I never though would happen. Yet, I feel that I need to finsh this couse first. I hope to be done with the lesson by the end of the weekend.

Seaching

What is it to live a life that has no meaning. No way of what it means to live a life fully given over to something. Whatever that might be. I can not understand how I have been making it though this time without going to the Chapel.(chapel.org) This time has been a time of rethinking of what it to be a part of a non-denonational church.
Since I getting my iPod in '06 I have been listening to many podcastes. These podcastes can be found at sqpn.com. The shows I'm subscibed to are the Rosary Army(rosaryarmy.com), the Daily Breakfest, and a few others.
These podcastes have given a face and voice to the Cathlic Church that I didn't have before. So much of what I thought of the Cathlic Church is not true. I have so much that I still do not know about. Which is why I downloaded an rcia podcast. It seems fitting that with the start taking a closer look at this.

New Year New Job

I feel so much better now that 2008 has started. Finally, I'm out of Valley Hi Nursing Home. And on to working at Peapod as a shopper. Though, I'm still trying to get use to working nights and sleeping during the day. This is not easy for me given that I've been a day person all my life. I can deal with this though. With better pay and not having to deal with the having to be fake at Valley Hi. I started Dec. 20. Earlier then I planned on because I could not take another day of working in such a harmful place.
So, hears to a new year (and job)!!!

It Is Time For Change

How great a God I serive and love. The power of prayer is great and powerful movement. There has been a great thing to see results of prayer. Even when it seems to some for somthing that could be seen a petty. Yet, I can't help but feel this is a gift given and must be lifted up to the Almighty and Powerful God. Who is worth of praise. Thank you oh Lord!!
While I'll be tenitively starting January 3, 2008. What a way to start of a new year. I can not help but feel somewhat scared about leaving Valley Hi. A place I've worked at for eight years. I find that there is some amount of fear to doing anything new.

Almost to a new job

It is hard to belive that I will be working at Peapod(peapod.com). Pulling and packing georcy items at night.Once they've run a crimial background check, a drug test, and call my references.As it stand right now I have the job. After eight years at Valley Hi it's time to be at a place where I'd be able to have a change to move up. Work for a company that will always have work to do and seems to be a great place to work. What will it be to work nights? I don't know but I'm willing to do that. Even though it will take some getting use to. This will be worth it.

Finding Grace

Grace. A gift I'm unworthy of getting. Much like that gift you asked for and thought you would never really get. While today it seems that I have been trying to make sense of what grace is and how it had change my life. There are no words that can explain this. Even if I could put words to it; it would only cheapen it.
I'm still finding grace. Even when I feel that I'm unworthy of it. God does. I'm his beloved daughter. He sees me as worthy. Yet, I don't feel this way much of the time. Given that when you come out with various sins the church, as a whole, call 'unforgivable'.
The Bible is clear. That we are to love all people. Even when they sin. No matter the sin. There is always grace and forgiveness. Which is given by God though the blood of Christ. No matter what cause us to stumble. The church has cause much heartache.
All I can do is pray!